![]() And since most people understand cuckolding to involve humiliation and degradation, telling someone you’re a cuckold when you’re not into those things is like telling someone you’re a power bottom when you don’t like anal or telling someone you’re into impact play when you don’t like having your ass so much as tapped. ![]() We have lots of words to describe letting your partner fuck other people-open, monogamish, swinging, mate-swapping, hotwifing, hothusbanding, stag and vixen, CNM-but we only have one word to describe letting your partner fuck other people while getting off on being humiliated and degraded: cuckolding. But I would argue that these guys aren’t cuckolds, WTCAI, just as I would argue that you aren’t a cuckquean. Venus is right: there are guys out there who call themselves cuckolds but aren’t subs and don’t wanna be humiliated or degraded. Humiliation, submission, and degradation don’t have to be involved!” I don’t see why hothusbanding/cuckqueaning can’t be just as varied. “Some cucks are submissive and get into degradation and some cucks really aren’t subs or into degradation at all. “But cuckolding and hotwifing have a really wide spectrum of practices and dynamics,” said Venus. (I put “cheated on” in quotes because the “cheating” is consensual and symbolic likewise, “sharing” is in quotes above because spouses aren’t property.) Cuckolds and cuckqueans, by definition, don’t just wanna see their spouses fucking another person, they also want their partners to humiliate and degrade them. ![]() They’re being “cheated on” by their husbands. And cuckqueans aren’t sharing their husbands. They’re being “cheated on” by their wives. (All this sharing, of course, is consensual.) Cuckolds, on the other hand, aren’t sharing their wives. ![]() Let’s quickly define terms: a man into hotwifing enjoys “sharing” his wife with other men, WTCAI, and a woman into hot husbanding enjoys “sharing” her husband with other women. So, what does that make me? Do cuckqueans come in all different proclivities? I feel like the end result is the same-my partner bedding someone else-but my motivation is different than what I’ve seen. And he would only be able to sleep with her with my consent and I would want to be “in control” of the situation. In my case, I would rather my husband not even know the name of the other woman. I’ve read accounts of women who are turned on by the humiliation and insecurity of their partner being with others, often women the husband knows “in real life,” either through work or through social life. I’m not interested in being “cheated on.” No flirty texts, no unsanctioned coffee dates. (With my husband’s consent, of course!) But in all my research, I’ve found different and sometimes conflicting definitions of what it means to be a “cuckquean.” I’m interested in watching my husband pleasure and be pleasured by another woman in a purely physical way. But I’ve done some research on it and it’s something I’m eager to try. He is intrigued but afraid that it might somehow damage our relationship. I’ve fantasized about this for years, but we’ve never acted on it. I’m a 36-year-old married woman who fantasizes about her husband of 10 years being intimate with other women. The full version is now exclusively available on Dan’s website Savage.Love. This is a preview of this week’s Savage Love.
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